Snarky Quiz
Here’s a hybrid of three random quizzes I found on MySpace just today, because I haven’t fulfilled my sarcasm quota for the day. Now, though, I’m all sarcasm-ed out. Anyway, don’t take my answers too seriously; I can come off as narcissistic and arrogant and emo all at same time, but that’s just something I affect so that it’s not too boring.
Name: Ariel, but you can call me God, I won’t mind
Birthday: August 17, 1989, which I now declare a religious holiday
Birthplace: in a hospital somewhere, I gather. China.
Current Location: …Heaven? No, wait, I’m in Pennsylvania; hell.
Eye Color: A distinctive non-color of brown
Hair Color: Burnt black, so more like reddish brown.
Height: Too short for comfort. 5′2″. I have a bit of a Napoleon complex.
Right Handed or Left Handed: Right, b/c I’m always right.
Your Heritage: An asian pureblood.
Your Weakness: Underneath my ribs. God I’m ticklish.
Your Fears: Failure. Unfulfillment. Oblivion.
Your Perfect Pizza: Pepperoni, mushroom, pineapple. Yay the whole food pyramid.
Goal You Would Like To Achieve This Year: Get into college and become richly successful? Okay, maybe just the latter.
Your Most Overused Phrase On an instant messenger: lol. I lol too much. I need to start making ppl earn their lols.
Thoughts First Waking Up: ‘Damn.’
Your Best Physical Feature: Not being mutated! Hurrah not being mutated!
Your Bedtime: If I had my way, my daytime would be nighttime. But alas, that’s impractical due to society’s constraints. I compromise…aronud 12AM on school nights and I tend to favor 3AM for weekends/holidays.
Your Most Missed Memory: If I were missing a memory then I wouldn’t have it…and I’m a bit OCD w/ most of my memories.
Pepsi or Coke: Pepsi, the underdog. Go Pepsi!
MacDonalds or Burger King: McDonald’s, for their admirable dedication to unwholesomeness.
Single or Group Dates: Single; it’d be a bit voyeur-istic if I went on a group date.
Chocolate or Vanilla: Vanilla is superior in every way.
Cappuccino or Coffee: Coffee’s classic. I can’t even spell cappuccino.
Do you Smoke: Ham, sometimes.
Do you Swear: Swearing is for the uneducated who can’t wrap their minds around words longer than a syllable. …Which is me, sometimes.
Do you Sing: Only badly.
Do you Shower Daily: Or else I’d be a stinking cesspool of filth.
Have you Been in Love: Love is a funny thing. It jumps you when you least expect it. Now I’m held hostage by it.
Do you want to go to College: Well if we can fast forward to the ‘vastly successful and rich’ part, I won’t mind. Otherwise, I guess I’ll have to work for my success. How barbaric.
Do you want to get Married: How’d you guess? Let’s go.
Do you believe in yourself: I’m the prime example of the the Little Engine That Could.
Do you get Motion Sickness: Occasionaly I have been sick while in motion, yes.
Do you think you are Attractive: Maybe to a blind person.
Are you a Health Freak: What’s freaky is how UNfreaky I am about my health. I probably have the physical health of someone 3x my age.
Do you get along with your Parents: …Let’s make that singular.
Do you like Thunderstorms: As long as I don’t get struck by lightning, b/c that might be vaguely unpleasant.
Do you play an Instrument: We’ll let stereotypes resolve that…and out of the choices of violin, piano, and flute, I play the first.
How do you want to Die: Laughing. Preferably not bitterly.
What do you want to be when you Grow Up: Successful.
What country would you most like to Visit: New Zealand. Blame LOTR.
In a Boy/Girl..
Favourite Eye Color: Green/Hazel. If they’re a bore I can at least stare at their eyes.
Favourite Hair Color: Red. I need to go to Ireland.
Short or Long Hair: Shaggy? Emo? Why are these not options? Discrimination.
Height: Not vertically challenged. Preferably vertically advanced, but not verging on circus sideshow.
Weight: 139.5 lbs, exactly. My god people, how can you not know what weight you want your loved one to be?!?!
Best Clothing Style: Wait, men know how to dress themselves? When did this happen?
1. Do you like your first name?
Well, it’s better than the other Disney options out there.
4. For or against same sex marriage?
For, in case the male gender proves too much of a failure.
6. Are you a homosexual?
No, but you can never be too sure.
7. Are you religious?
I’m very dedicated to worshipping myself.
9. how many US states have you lived in?
1…2….3…and that’s 3 too many.
10. have you ever lived outside the US?
…And I would have completed my takeover of china by age 6 if not for the fact that I was tricked into going to the zoo, aka the US.
12. Do you like the color pink?
Pink has its benefits- it’s very lack of appeal is a plus, b/c it gives me something to dislike.
13. Do you keep a lot of secrets from people?
Enough to keep it interesting.
14. what is your dream car?
The working kind. Maybe I’ll get a bit high-tech and ask for air-conditioning too.
15. if you could have one super power…what would it be?
…Be even more perfect than I already am? That’s like an UBER-superpower.
18. do you download music?
Well, I certainly don’t eat it.
24. Do you like Politics?
WOw, it’s the special capitalized version of politics. It must be even worse than the generic version.
25. Are you afraid of heights?
More like the impending death from falling from a high place.
27. Have you driven a truck?
I’m from Texas. Next question.
28. Have you ever dated someone 10 years older than you?
Why? Any offers?
37. Are you attracted to people who are muscular?
Right, I want someone whose bicep is larger than his head. That IS a turn-on.
41. Do you go to Starbucks often?
Enough to know that I should go there less.
45. Do you have an i-pod?
And feed the corporate machine? NEVER!
46. Do you like Purple or yellow better?
I actually like the rare shade of purple yellow. It’s so exotic.
47. Is there someone you want to say “I love you” to but you know you never could?
‘Never’ lasted for the span of about five minutes and then I blurted it out.
48. Do you have a retainer?
I neatly sidestepped any need for mouthgear when my teeth fixed themselves. No joke.
49. Are you comfortable with your height?
Napoleon complex.
51. Do you take medication on a daily basis?
Unfortunately, no.
52. Do you like insects?
For lunch. Yum.
53. whats your favorite food?
Edible’s usually a nice start.
54. Do you like to read?
Only books right now, but I’m working on people’s minds. I think that would make for infinitely more interesting reading.
61. Can you dance?
Dancers have more muscles in abs than I do in my whole body.
62. Have you ever fallen down a flight of staires?
It’s an imminent threat. I’m pretty clumsy.
63. Do you own a car?
…But I can’t drive it. Ha the world is a funny place.
65. What was the latest you have ever stayed up?
All-nighter, ONCE. The following day I felt like I was drugged.
[1] What is your middlE NAME?
Ariel, but ‘Ima’ works too. (In my last name, the ‘u’ is silent.)
[2] What color is your mailbox?
It’s shaped like a little blue barn. My mailbox is better looking than my house.
[3] Are you available?
I sold out a month ago. Tough luck.
[4] Have you ever hit a deer?
I rarely go out of my way to hit deer. I’m not a hater.
[5] Do you have to drive over a bridge to get home?
You’re supposing I drive.
[8] What is your favorite band?
Good music’s a plus.
[9] Do you have a digital camera?
A pre-requisite for any aspiring emo.
[10] Do you like school?
If there were no learning involved, it would have potential.
[11] Are you sick?
Only mentally.
[14] Whats you favorite sport?
Sport? Implying physical movement and stress? People LIKE that stuff?
[16] Are you taller than your mom?
The negative probably lends to my Napoleon complex.
[18] Are you God?
I CAN be, if you want.
[19] What do you do to get over a broken heart?
Buy a new one in the shop.
[20] Do you enjoy writing in colored pens?
If they smell good.
[22] Do you often cry during a movie?
Case in point: Lion King. As I get older, I cry harder.
[25] Do you hate your life?
Well, it’s looking up.
[26] Do you get mad easily?
I don’t get mad ‘hardly’.
[28] What is your biggest pet peeve?
Ignorance tortures me. It doesn’t just kill me, because that would be too merciful.
[29] Are you cold?
More cold than hot.
[30] Do any of your friends have kids?
Well, do you?
[31] Do you know anyone that is pregnant right now?
Well, are you?
[32] Who should pay on the first date?
The person who was agreed upon.
[33] How many years older than you are you willing to date?
Case by case basis. I also consider negative years.
[34] Do you have any friends?
How’d you guess?
[35] Do you have any mean friends?
Well, including myself, I’m 1 for 1.
[36] What is the ugliest color in your opinion?
Any color that isn’t the color of deep, endless despair. (Haha, I emo myself out sometimes.)
[37] Have you ever liked someone who all your friends couldn’t stand?
When you consider the fact that I’m my only friend, that question answers itself.
[38] Have you ever felt like driving off a cliff, seriously?
I could achieve the same result without a cliff. Just have me drive around for 20 minutes, maybe 10 in inclement weather.
[40] Do you scratch your ears?
My favorite hobby.
[43] How tall are you?
Another jibe at my height. I see how it is.
[46] If you were born the opposite sex, what would your parents name you?
Boy. Maybe if they got creative they’d name me Bob.
[47] If you could go back to any time period when would it be?
Back to before I was born so I could have genetically altered myself to be a fusion of Einstein and Zhan Ziyi. …Right.
[48] Do you want to have kids?
Not yours.
[49] What is the brightest color you’re wearing?
It was white…once.
[52] Whats your mother’s middle name?
We’re Chinese, silly.
[54] What is your favorite ps2 game?
Soul Calibur II cannot be beat.
[55] Do you like your dad?
Meh.
[56] Do you have any TV shows on DVD?
I guess I’m missing out on that important part of life.
[58] Do you have a tattoo?
On my brain.
[61] Do you know how to draw?
I know how to put pencil to paper, yes.
[63] Who is your hero?
Anybody who decides to write my government paper for me. Volunteers?
[65] Do you work a lot of hours?
On getting more sarcastic and cynical, yeah.
[68] Is there anything you regret?
Eating those pickles just now. Ow, stomach.
[69] Do you know where your family name originated from?
…From being the Emperor’s concubines? Ionno.
[70] Animal that creeps you out?
Man.
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